There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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How do you know when a Captcha defect causes you to post the same anti-joke three times? Canteloupe.

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

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Henry VIII: I need another wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thomas Wolsey: All right then. How about my nan? Henry VII: I'm dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :~D

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what did one bean say to the other bean??? hows it been.

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If you call a quiz a quizzicle, what do you call a test? A set of questions or problems used as a means of evaluating the abilities, aptitudes, skills, or performance of an individual or group.

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Mommy, Mommy, I don't like Daddy! Well leave him on the side of the plate and eat your peas instead!

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What did one teacher say to the other teacher? We're both under-payed.

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what has two legs and is red all over a fireman doing his job

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Boy: Why is the sky blue? Man: Because it is

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jd and zach loves vigina

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? An alive one at the bottom eating its way up.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock, knock Who's there? Not Susie

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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A black man walks into a convienent store, pays for his stuff and leaves

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Why was the man alone? Because he was tied to a tree.

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give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

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How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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why did the man take the bus to work he didnt have a liscence

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Why did the blonde walk into the men's restroom? Because the blonde was a man who needed to expel his feculent waste.

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Why did the cow fall Cause a fat kid pushed him over

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? Hi. He said it in sign language.

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Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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