How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

A student asks a teacher: Sir, how much time would it take for me to do this quiz. Teacher says: From the second I give you this test to the second you hand it back to me.

What do you do when life gives you lemons? You eat them.

Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

What's white and sticky? A white stick.

Whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

why didn't the girl like that one guy? he hurt her, hurt her real bad.

Q:What do you call a sheep with no legs? A: A cloud.

Julian Ha.

What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

troll lololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol.olo90ololol.o.ool.olololol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.o.o.lol.ol.ol.ol.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A man and a woman are having sex. The man finishes and says, "Oh, God, I hope you're on the pill." The girl says she isn't and begins to cry. Lacking a job or a stable life, the man leaves the woman. The woman has an abortion and suffers irreversible damage to her ovaries.

How do you know when you are really ugly? Objective self-evaluation, and frank, honest discussion with close friends and family.

What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

sit in the dark for about 4 or 5 hours covered in Vaseline with a huge dildo inside of your arse

How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Ele PHa n T

man 1.have u sen my girl friend man 2. yes man 1. rely man 2. no man 1. dick

Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

Roses are reddish Violets are bluish If it wasn't for Christmas We'd all be Jewish

Pretty vague, if I did not know you, Id conclude you where working for some mob syndicate or something.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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