why was the baby crying? cause his abusive father broke his arm.

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I played the spoon game. In a white neighborhood.

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How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

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Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

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"I saw daddy with mommy last night. I think he was stealing my milk."

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What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

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25

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Kevin: Why can't you hear a pterodactyl urinate? Bob: Because it's extinct? Kevin: No you idiot! The P is silent! Pterodactyl: RAARRGHH! (eats Bob)

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What did the fat lady order at McDonalds? Nothing because she forgot here wallet at home.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

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Q: why couldn't anyone hear hellen keller when she fell off a cliff? A: she was mute.

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What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

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What's worst than dropping your watch into the gutter? Waking up with a penis on your head.

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roses are red and violets are blue and i was going to write something that rimes but that is not funny here.

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What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

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Why did the fat kid rob a pizza shop? Because he happened to like pizza.

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

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How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

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Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

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Hey, I'm Schrödinger, and this is crazy! But here's a sealed box... the cat lives, maybe...

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Women are like fish. It's hard to tell when they are crying underwater.

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So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

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Tilt your screen back .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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