What's johnny's favorite bedtime story? The sound of the subway. Johnny and his father are homeless and can't afford bedtime stories

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you will like this because i am black.

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Why Was 6 Afraid of 7? Because 7 was a Pedophile

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What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Today is Valentines Day I am depressed

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

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The horse walks into the bar and the bartender says, "why the long face?" the horse looks at him and says, "my wife just died."

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What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

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In my eyes Nero, you are much like a philosopher, the kind which are mocked while they live, and then a couple thousands years later, are recognized as the most intelligent beings of their time.

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What did the dog say to the astro turf? SHUT UP!! I don't want to here your excuses, put the dishes away when you're done with them or so help me! You see the dog had been abused as a puppy and as a result he was always a bit off.

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nothing

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Yes, I did not begin this alone, but things got complicated, you know who Alex Knight is right?

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Why do gingers smell so bad? So the blind can hate them too

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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Why wouldnt you want to hit a black man that is on a bike with your car? It mite be your bike

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How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

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NO IT IS MINE! ALL MINE!

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Why did Johnny fall of the Swing?? Because i hit him with a shovel

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Your momma is so black, that her melanin levels are relatively high.

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A man walks into a bar. And has a beer.

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Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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