Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock Knock. I said who's there? Knock Knock. WHO THE FUCK'S THERE, GODDAMNIT? Knock Knock. PLEASE STOP IT STOP IT OH GOD STOP IT Knock Knock SWEET DEAR JESUS GOD CHRIST STOPSTOPOHGODSTOPITNOW Knock Knock. FORGODSSAKECOMEIN. Hello, Mark. Oh, hi, Steven.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the man hit by the car? Hellen Keller was driving.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

If two blondes had a kid it would probably be a blonde because two recessive chromosomes have a higher chance of showing than one dominant gene.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Question:Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Answer:Because she had no arms or legs. Question:What did little Susie get for Christmas? Answer: a bike, and cancer Question: what did little Susie get next Christmas? Answer: nothing, she didn't live that long... Knock knock Who's there Not little Susie

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into the bathroom. He dumps cat shit all over the floor

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +6

2 * 2 * 2 * 3 * 2417

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How does a man with no arms and legs get to your door. After asking his name please help us out with this question

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Lambos are red Tuxedos are Blue The cat is out of the bag Shit, we're all gonna die in helll

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why didn't they let the black people play baseball? Because they're bigoted bastards.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a black elephant? An elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the teenager take a shower? Because she was brutally raped by a serial rapist and felt dirty. Unfortunately for her, she was unaware that she was washing off the prints from her body and the rapist was never found

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why are black people afraid of tigers? Because tigers eat people

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why didnt the chicken cross the road? He was chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What goes in and out of a hole? A Rabbit you people have dirty minds!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock knock Whos there? Sorry, wrong house,goodbye!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's slippery when wet? A wet slipper.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the woman shout at the bin? Because she is mentally ill

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops