A young man walks up and sits down at the bar. "What can I get you?" asks the bartender. "I want six shots of whisky," responds the young man. "Six shots? What’s the occasion?" asks the barman. "My first blowjob." "Well, in that case, let me give you a seventh on the house." To which the young man replies, "No offence sir, but if six shots won't get rid of the taste, nothing will."

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what do you call obama a dumbass

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Q: Why did the little boy have freckles? A: Heredity

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what did the African baby get for his birthday?..... AIDS

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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Q: Why didn't i save my work? A: Because i didn't do any work?

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he died.

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A chicken walks into a bar and orders a beer. Just kidding chickens cant talk and animal control was called

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

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Where did the duck hide its pail? UNDER THE STAIRS!!

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

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What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

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There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had different colors of hair.

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How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

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i like turtles

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why did the dog cross the street? because it saw a squirrel

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Why did Dolley Madison take the painting of George Washington out of the White House in 1814. It was on fire. By, Luke Atkins

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AND

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

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Kys

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Aodhan, Kevin, Taggart and Caoimhin walk into a bar. They have drinks and then leave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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