What you you call peanut butter on the top of a dog house Peanut butter

How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

What did Bambi say to her mother when her mother was killed? Nothing. Bambi's a deer. Duh.

Why didn't the African kid eat lunch? He wasn't hungry.

how much blondes does it take to fix a light bulb 1 to buy the bulb 2 to put it up and 25 to think about what it does

Joe: Will you remember me tomorrow? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next week? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next month? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next year? Mack: Yes Joe: Knock knock Mack: Who's there? Joe: See you forgot me already! Mack: No I didn't Joe, I thought you were going to tell me a knock knock joke. :/

Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returned and said, "My friend does not have a pulse and he is not breathing, so I stand by my prior assumption."

Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

There is a 5 second long and extremely depressing video, most cant watch it for any longer than 6 seconds

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

Where do you find a dog with no legs ? Same place you left it ...

once you go Persian, there is no other alternative

What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

why did the irishman leave the bar he had to go to his sons birthday party

When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

Two blonds walk into a bar, the brunette ducked

What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

What did nearly headless nick say when he became headless nick. Nothing because he doesnt have a head

What do you get when you mix a elephant and a rhino? A nasty tasting smoothie.

why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

What is a chicken? Because 7, 8, 9.

Did you hear about the peanut that was assaulted? He filed a police report weeks ago and is upset by the sluggish nature of the justice system.

roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...