Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to give it a female name.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road ? A. Because he had grown tired of living thus choosing to end his life.

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What does greg and Ian have in common?

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Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Last christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, you're body rejected the transplant and you died.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot? an orange parakeet

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There's two muffins in an oven, the first muffin says "Woah, it's really hot in here!". The second muffin says "Oh my God! A talking muffin!"

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All these jokes are very entertaining, but if you look closely, Lebron clearly travels. Wheres the call ref what the hell.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a dog in your apple

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Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is theoretically impossible to read another's inner thought process, but it was probably due to the electric stimulation from the brain to give the chicken's muscles the ability to move.

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-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

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Why did the man die when he hugged the pillow? He was hallucinating at the grand canyon.

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Who has, there are like... Well actually I might have watched them all, downloaded them in a torrent... A LEGAL torrent of course... NOT. Well, you get a hint, it looks a lot like Mickey Mouse, and its a trick question since Mickey Mouse was not actually drawn by Disney, so yeah.

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Your mom is so poor; she doesn't have a job.

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Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

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Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops