Knock Knock. Who's there? Who. Who, Who? Shut up you damn owl, I'm trying to deliver a pizza.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

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Why was the little boy late for school? Because he was hit by a truck.

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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Your mom is so old she died

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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whats worse than four babies in a box? one baby in four boxes

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boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

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How long does it take to paint a house with babies? It matters how hard you throw them.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? Sara had no arms! Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sara!

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why was sally the best at hid and go seek they couldn't find her body

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My grandpa died in the Holocaust He fell from the guard tower

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

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A man walks into a bar a browning automatic rifle, it accidentally fires hitting the main artery in his neck and he promptly bleeds to death.

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What's the cure of cancer? Death.

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How do you wake a clown up? By pouring vinegar in his eyes.

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

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A tortoise went for a run. It took him two hours to get around the corner.

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Whats the difference between anti-jokes and regular jokes? A Fridge full of dead babies being thrown at a black man with no arms or legs swinging from a tree.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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