A man goes to the doctor and complains: "Doctor, my Viagra hasn't worn off! It's been over eight hours!" The doctor replies "You were bitten by a banana spider. You have one day to live.

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

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What is the name of the mermaid on the Starbucks logo? No one knows, she ran away many years ago of shame. It's undiscovered why.

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What do you call a white duck? A quacker

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A Jew, an Irishman and a Russian walk into the bar and the bartender says, "Get the Hell out."

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A tragedy almost unparalleled in marine history.

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roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

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why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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Q:your jetski loses a wheel. how many pancakes does it take to fix your house? A:blue berry icecream.

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XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

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Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

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Why is Joe is ugly? I dont Know

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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Why do dead babies go to funerals? They don't.

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Why did Sandra fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock Who is there? Not Sandra

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Q.Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? A.One is a human and the other is an inanimate object used to give people a rest.

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How do you kill a pirate? Throw him of a bridge

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What starts with P and ends with "oop" POOP

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops