When life gives you lemons.............. take them free stuff is awesome.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

a black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. the bartender says thats cool where did you get it ....... the parrot says africa

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Turn your Caps Lock off, people think you're yelling at them, Stephen Hawking.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

So a baby seal walks into a club

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A hobo said to another hobo "Im homeless"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock knock? Who's there? John. John who? John who is hospitalized in critical condition because he was struck by a ladder.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock Knock Who's there? Your a slut

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Daniel Nitz cross the road during rush hour? Because he's an idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: what do you call a deer with no eyes A; roadkill

thumb_up thumb_down -4

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What kind of time is it when you fall from a ladder and are moments from landing straight on a operational circle saw? Moral: ITS TIME TO SPLIT!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

wnna here a joke, toby limbers playing basketball

thumb_up thumb_down -4

And so the baseball says to the tractor........ Your not my dad

thumb_up thumb_down -4

NO ONE LIKES YOU!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the boys run from Michael Jackson? because they thought he was a ghost

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Eric went for a poo in the public toilets. After he finished, he realised that there was no toilet roll. So he had to just pull up his pants and put up with his sshitty arse for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, he was in a board meeting and when he went in he stank of shit and it was a very uncomfortable feeling.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A few people were put in a room with 5 doors and 4 were a certain death one was freedom and they had to choose a door to go in not knowing which was freedom the first person went in the door on the far left. He got raped by Michael Jackson. The second guy opened the door on the far right. He got in a room entirely made of ice cream. He ate all of it and got such a brain freeze his brain froze. The third and final guy turned around and noticed a door labeled exit. He exited the room and continued his life as a normal person

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a black man in a hole? "sir". He is A colnel in the US marines fighting for his country in a pivotal battle to maintain american interests in other countries.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A boy spilt his milk on the floor, and then cleaned it up before his mum got home.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a gynochologist named John? John

thumb_up thumb_down -4

You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

"....did he fire six shots or only five....." It doesn't really matter, considering he will die of blood loss soon

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops