There once was a man named bulagala moo moo boom chicka boom. Sometimes, when wipe the toilet tissue breaks and my fingers get all dirty. Good thing I have insurance!

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What is grosser than somebody eating their own booger? Someone else eating that persons booger

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Hey, guess what. What? ... Hello? Sorry, I don't talk to strangers.

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the economy.

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So an alien walks into a bar......... and everyone runs away secreaming because theres an alien in the bar.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? I don't know, I've never tried to.

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What's sad about black people that drink grape soda and eat fried chicken? The stereotypes are true.

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What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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Why didn't the magician pull a rabbit from a hat? Despite his choice of occupation, magic tricks are rarely appropriate in hostage situations.

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What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

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Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

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What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

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Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

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What's worse than being named SAID? Having AIDS.. And getting a bee sting - it hurts like ****!

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What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

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Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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I got into an argument with my friend the other day. He contested that the onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I beat his wife to death with a coconut,

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What did hitler get for christmas??? Roughly 3 million dead jews in the ashtray

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How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

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What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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What is better than one trillion dollars? One trillion and one dollars... duh.

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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