Where do bees go to the bathroom? In the hive - they're incontinent.

What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

What did the black man say to the Hispanic? Lovely weather we're having.

What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

I don't always drink beer but when I do, I viciously beat my wife and children.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What did the nun eat for breakfast? Baseballs.

What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

Q:what do you do when a black guy is drowning A:you dont

Why was the boy crying on his birthday? He was being molested by his birthday clown who he was fully aware was his alcoholic costumed father.... And it wasn't his birthday.

Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

a man walks into the bar and say, OUCH!!

Knock knock Who's there? Justin Bieber OH MY GOD REALLY?! No.

What's worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust.

I am Asian, I've seen the color blue, but God made a mistake, Asians are taller than you.

what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

Yo mamas so fat, when she jumps in a pool she displaces a disproportionate volume of water.

why did the guy throw his clock out the window? because he wanted to see a clock fall out the window

J?????????????????o??????????????????????k?????????????????????????e?????????????????????????????????????s??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????o??????????????????????n??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????y???????????????????????????????????o????????????????????????????????u????????????????????????????????.?????????????????????????????.????????????????????.????????????????????????

Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains! That's the least of your worries you have aids!

You know that Duck song on youtube? I dont get it... ducks cant talk...

Q: Why was Luigi sad? A: Because he entered the Twilight Zone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...