Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

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Q : WHAT DID THE SMALL SHEEP SAY TO THE BIG SHEEP ? Z : BÆÆÆ

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What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

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Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

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what do u call a black persons face? a black persons face...

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A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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If a quiz is also referred to as a quizzicle, then what is a test also referred to as? A test, really. There are no synonyms for 'test' which would result in a humorous punchline; 'exam,' 'essay' and 'evaluation' are the closest possible answers and none of them provide humor at all.

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What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

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i like my coffee like i like my women... Without a penis

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What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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When is the only time you see a Mexican and Black person driving together ? When they feel like it .

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How did the black man get a nice car? He spent 8 years of his life getting a doctorate so he could be hired at a job that will pay for his desired vehicle.

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? Jimmy was a goldfish.

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What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

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cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

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What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

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Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

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Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

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"I had angry birds before it was cool." -Alfred Hitchcock

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Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

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You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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