Hats better than a stick? A stone

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whats worse than watching your house burn to the ground? Sarah Palin becoming president

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Roses are red Violets are blue Today is Valentines Day I am depressed

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

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69

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What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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A Black man is running down the street with a T.V. He just bought it with the money he is getting from his recent promotion to partner at a local Law firm. He is running because he had to park far away and wanted to get out of the rain.

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Why wouldn't someone want to work in the mining industry? Their dad died in the mines.

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Q : WHAT DID THE SMALL SHEEP SAY TO THE BIG SHEEP ? Z : BÆÆÆ

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why did the parents order the 16 year old daughter to move out of Virginia? Because she lost her virginity

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"I had angry birds before it was cool." -Alfred Hitchcock

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How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

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Why was the baby's face red? Because it was bloody.

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What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

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Under Chuck Norris' beard, there is a chin.

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Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? I don't know, I've never tried to.

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WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

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what did one gagged man say to the other gagged man? nothing he was gagged

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Why did the christian go into the church? To pray.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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