Why did the father and his son drop their cola? Because a meteor hit and killed all life on Planet Earth.

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How do you run faster than a cheetah? Cut off its legs.

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause it wanted to. Why di the chicken cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the cow's face.

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On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

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what's black and can't swim? a black refrigerator

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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What did the woman say to the man before she had sex with him? "May I have sex with you, please?"

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How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

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whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

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Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

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why did jenny drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock who's there? not jenny.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, I have amnesia.

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Knock Knock ! Who's there? Jim. Oh come in.

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Why did the kid fall? He got pushed off of a building

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

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What's worse than getting a papercut? Literally anything.

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what do you call a bunch of black people in a pool cocoa puffs

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Gladly, you sound very confident, makes me happy. Well, doctors thought I had ADHD (go figure) but I am pretty calm outside the internet, then they went with ADD, but since my attention is twofold, this meaning that I can get a lecture, while noticing a toothpick falling on the other side of the room (noticing as in perceiving with focus not necessarily listening but you know, seeing from the corner of ones eye) Yet still focus well enough to get the lecture in details. So its not split focus such as in ADD, but dual, as in me being able to think about two things at once, but also burning out extremely fast, which again, is far from ADD.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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how do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed? pick up a parenting book ask him nicely try a time out not care because he's a kid and hes supposed to jump on beds?

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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Ten black people are on the 100th floor of a 110 floor building. They are going to die because they are trapped in the World Trade Center and are leaving a very happy life with their loving families.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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