Rosie are red velvet blue I made eggs just for you

A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

What is the last thing to go through a flies head before it hits a windshield. Nothing because flies aren't capable if rational thought.

Roses are red Violets are blue I like pussy Because it feels really good when I stick my penis inside her vaginal opening

Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

I've got a great new 'Knock Knock Jock

how do you make a plumber cry?.... kill his family

Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

whate white and cant climb trees? powdered sugar

Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

I said no! Its not funny... Maybe a little but stop it, I am having trouble enough finding out which comments are mine as it is.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

salad days!

What did the man say to his wife. Hi

What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

ha ha, I can talk and you can't.

where did you get those clothes? at the toilet store.

You know what's a real drag? A club foot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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