Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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Why can't sluts count to 70? Well, slut is a derogative term for prostitutes, and most prostitutes are people that had rough, often traumatising childhoods. Many ran away from home at an early age, thus leaving them devoid of a proper education.

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When life gives you melons. You're not dyslexic because you can probably tell the difference between a lemon and melon because they look so different.

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Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

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Whats a six letter name for black people? Friend.

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What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

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i did a 360 noscope, then i jizzed. from dylan

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If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

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Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

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when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. when life gives you melons, you are soon diagnosed with dyslexia.

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What's black and white and read all over? Corn, I lied about everything.

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Your sex life.

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Why couldnt the man buy food? Because.

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do you have snow in your vagina? because i am going to plow you

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I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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Q:How do you kill an Elephant? A:With an Elephant gun Q:How do you kill a blue Elephant? A:With a blue Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a purple Elephant? A:With a purple Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a red Elephant? A:There is no such thing.

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How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

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Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

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Why didn't the Irishman walk into the bar? Beacause he had killed himself the previous night as a result of his alcoholism.

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A man goes to the potty.

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how many dead babies can you fit into a bath tub i dont know i didnt get the chance to fill it up yet

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What do you do when you're given a phonebook? You ask for their name.

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Not gonna tell you, that was one weird story, I feel like super high right now.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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