Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Who kills babies? A baby killer? No. I do.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Jumping out of an airplane without a parachute is a once in a lifetime expeirence.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call a black priest? Holy s***

thumb_up thumb_down -20

An American man walks to Mc Donalds.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Bob: This joke is so hilarious but you must start off by saying knock knock. Tom: okay... Knock knock Bob: who's there? Tom: ...... Bob: well? Tom: I don't know what to say??? Bob: so the joke left ya speechless!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Henry VIII: I need another wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thomas Wolsey: All right then. How about my nan? Henry VII: I'm dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :~D

thumb_up thumb_down -20

whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you say to a fat guy working out congrat him and tell him he's doing a great job and keep up the work

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was young Timmy Crying? Unfortunately he had a very rare but serious heart condition and he would probably die within a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Jokes Ki Duniya

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's worse than cancer? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's got eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs head.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

The optimist sees the glass as half full. The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The average American sees a half-finished glass of water that is not flavored and is therefore is not worth any reasonable person's time.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What made Qtip's so dangerous? Q-tip's music

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the black man wash his feet? PHOIT!!!! He washed his feet in a bird bath... Too bad his car got thrown off a cliff by a bald eagle with no feathers?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says "It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man walks into a bar holding a magic lamp. The bartender asks "what are you holding?" The man says "It's a magic lamp." The bartender looks at the man and scratches his head. It turns out the bartender has had a problem with lice in his hair. If you believe in a magic genie is going to grant any wishes you're reading the wrong story. Anyways, the bartender buys medicated shampoo and no longer has head lice. The guy with the magic lamp was totally worthless.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How can you treble the value of any Skoda car? Ensure its paintwork, upholstary, floor, lights, wipers, steering wheel, brake, horn, CD player, radio and clutch are clean and/or sound; fill its petrol tank, oil, brake and winscreen wiper fluid reserves; fit a roof rack; include a red triangle, a fire extinguisher, a blanket and a first aid kit in the sale; take out comprehensive insurance and pay a year's road tax and MOT before selling it.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops