What do you call a baby that got hit by a train? Thomas

Link ate ink to make him sink.

How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? ...You mean, you don't know?

Why are black people black? They're not. They're brown you idiot.

What's the difference between Santa and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney.

Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

A girl walks into a bar and the bartender says, "why is your face so tan?" And she replies "I just got back from the beach."

THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

What did one bunny rabbit say to the other bunny rabbit? I'm a bunny rabbit!

What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

Shakespeare walks into a bar, Having just seen someone that has been dead for over 400 years, the young man in the corner quits his drug addiction; it was clearly messing with his brain.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

what is orange and sounds like a parrot a carrot

Why is the deer afraid of the hunter? Because he doesn't want to get shot.

what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

-On a scale of one to ten, what's your favourite colour of the alphabet? -The answer is yes, because aliens don't wear hats.

How do you confuse a gay person? How? 7

Kevin stinks signed Taggart. Is this how you do it!!!

Q: If 0+0=2 and four shampoo bottles is equal to two toaster strudels, how many pizza slices can Samuel eat? A: Winter because grass=6

why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black person on a bike? Its probably your bike.

your a vagina says you, your a booby

How would I re-arrange the alphabet? I would place P in your butt...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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