What happen to the guy who stole the TV. He runs away as he fears the person that stoled his/her TV reports him/her to the police.

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What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Six Million Jews.

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What did one teacher say to the other teacher? We're both under-payed.

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What's long,black and wrapped in something yellow ?? A twix

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How many dead babies can fit in a barrel? 4 1/2

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How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

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Q: Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? A: A burglar

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Who wants $300? Me too.

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What does it mean if you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars? You both have five dollars

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Neither does the chicken. (you're supposed to laugh...)

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A small child walks past a man on the street: Fortunately, as the man hates children he is perfect height to let a massive fart rip in his face on the way past. His mum looks disgusted. They carry on with their day.

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Bala: Brid why don't you drink? Brid: When I was in college I was in students council. Whenever my friends called me during night, I used to go pick them up. Once we were working late in college and in the morning my hair was all ruined...

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roses are red, violates are blue, you left me for David, I am about to kill you *bam* *bam**bam*

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Gladly, you sound very confident, makes me happy. Well, doctors thought I had ADHD (go figure) but I am pretty calm outside the internet, then they went with ADD, but since my attention is twofold, this meaning that I can get a lecture, while noticing a toothpick falling on the other side of the room (noticing as in perceiving with focus not necessarily listening but you know, seeing from the corner of ones eye) Yet still focus well enough to get the lecture in details. So its not split focus such as in ADD, but dual, as in me being able to think about two things at once, but also burning out extremely fast, which again, is far from ADD.

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What happened when the black man tried to cross the road Nothin. He tripped on a bug trying to get on the edge

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Why shouldn't gingers smoke before they are 3? Because they have souls and still abide by the same rules!........................................................................................................................................ If you laughed at that you either don't like gingers or should be shot. And by the way... Why did Snape kill Dumbledore? Because he had to.

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It's red or yellow but most likely grey, and when its hit your eye you are dead? A train :)

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have u been drinking cannabel soup because you........ahhhhh!!!!! why are you trying to eat me!

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3 men are walking down a dirt path. One is a retired member of the US Air Force. The other of the Marines. The last one of the Navy. They are arguing about why their respective section of the military is the best. They lose track of where they're going and fall off of a cliff onto the spinning propeller of a US Coast Guard helicopter.

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whats black and white and covered in blood Michael Jackson being stabbed

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What is orange, has 7 legs, and makes the same noise as a crow? If you can think of something that fits all of those characteristics, you need help

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops