knock knock who's there? doorbell repairman

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roses are blue violets are red heres a gun now your dead

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I walk into a bar...

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A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

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"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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Knock knock Who's there? Your mom Oh hi mom

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Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

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What's your blood type? Red.

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Jesse gets back at people who takes his job, by trying to get with their sloppy seconds.. Emphasize trying.

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knock knock whos there cops o shit come on they found out about pot lets go

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why such the long face?" the horse is now crying in tears because the bartender made him. by Brennan pickrell

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Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

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What do you call a black flying an airplane? A pilot you racist bastard.

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Man: What is the meaning of life? God: Buffalo wings. Lots and lots of buffalo wings.

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My girlfriend says i cant finish a sentence properly dripping horse cum fetus rape.

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What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

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What is black and bad for your teeth? A cannon ball

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

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Why did the gay kid drop his ice cream Because he got punched in the face.

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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