Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimers, Cheese on toast.

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how does an Arab scare someone He does a countdown

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A black man walks into a bar He looks at the menu and realizes he's in a bar, so he leaves

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Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

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What do u call a beaner when he stands up 4 foot nothing

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

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why did the boys run from Michael Jackson? because they thought he was a ghost

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What do you call an apple, an orange, and a pear in a bowl? Fruit

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Just gonna stand there and watch me roar. But that's alright because I am a dinosaur.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he needed to go home.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'll choke you with a hose

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Jesus Christ

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How many apple does it take to turn a fridge into a water buffalo? Yellow tactics because of the Minty fragrance

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where did you get those clothes? at the toilet store.

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A hooded black man walks into a Convenience store. He orders a cup of hot chocolate as it is very cold outside.

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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Gay republicans

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's dog? Neither has anyone else, because it ran away yesterday, and was most likely hit by a car.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

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My mom always said that jumping in a pile of leaves was fun! That was before a 20 foot long iguana bit her head off...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops