What's worse than a dead baby falling out of a tree? Two dead babies stapled together falling out of a tree.

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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Roses are Red, Violets are not blue they are violet, nothing rhymes with this, I give up

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I don't have a girlfriend but I do know a girl who would get really mad if she heard me say that.

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Q: What did the chicken cross the road? A: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" is a common riddle or joke in several languages. The answer or punchline is: "To get to the other side." The riddle is an example of anti-humor, in that the curious setup of the joke leads the listener to expect a traditional punchline, but they are instead given a simple statement of fact. "Why did the chicken cross the road?" has become largely iconic as an exemplary generic joke to which most people know the answer, and has been repeated and changed numerous times.

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what do an elephant and a mouse have in common? nothing

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because it is a horse and doesn't understand English. It gets confused about it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, upending a few tables along the way.

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What do Batman and Harry Potter have in common? Their parents are dead.

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a black guy with a parrot on his shoulder was walking down the street. another man asked, "where did you get him?" The parrot said, "theres tons of them in africa."

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Why did the Jews go into the shower? Because they had just finish a basketball game and they needed to freshen up.

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How many armless people does it take to change a lightbulb? I dunno, that's why I asked you... Hello?

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Q why was John bullied A Becuase he told kids that bullying was a bad and serious problem to get them to stop bullying jimmy unfortunately Jimmy killed himself because he was bullied to much and didn't want to live.

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A blonde, a brunnette, and a red head all jump from the top of a building. They all land at the same time because of Newton's 3rd Law

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks, as he saw the first two men previously walking into it, and it looks like it rather hurt.

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Sixty... eight

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When's the best time to kill a black man? Never. Committing murder is a felony and constitutes as highly immoral.

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't come anyways.

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How do you make an anti-joke offensive? Add racism to it.

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Why did the boy cry after baseball practice? He was molested by his coach.

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Whats green, furry and it stole christmas? A Robber with a Christmas tree on his back

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what did the lesbian do with the other lesbian? played badminton

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Q

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being disturbed by two black guys raping a young girl with leukemia

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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