What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why were the Dinosaurs wiped out? Porridge.

What happened When The lion asked the dog of a soda can? The giraffe who is taller the lion or the whos the fastest?

Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

Patient- "Doctor, doctor help me! I've only got 59 seconds to live!" Doctor- "I'll be there in a minute."

I just threw up..In my pants.

Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

Why did the boy fail his final? His severe depression and progressive detachment from reality caused him to hang himself the night before

Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

Yo momma is so stupid that she walked off a cliff.

why did the turtle beat the rabbit ? because the rabbit eventually got shot

Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

Roses are red Violets are blue Violets are actually purple or white

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

what happened when the boy jumped? he landed

Knock knock. "Who's there?" "It's Mr. Johnson, your next door neighbor." "Come on in."

2 gays monkeys walk into a bar.........

What's Kanye West's goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

-Ask me if I'm a tree. +Are you a tree? -Yes. -Ask me if I'm an orange. +Are you an orange? -No, I'm a tree, were you listening me?

A black guy and a white girl are having sex. The white girl screams "I'm pregnant!!!!" The black guy says "i'll help you take care of it" "I love you sweetie and nothing will come between us"

Q. What did the gay kid say to his group of straights? A. 10 dollars to the first one to tip over that little asian boy on the bike.

Gay republicans

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Hello, I am Sergent Henry Orange. I'm afraid your husband was shot down by an enemy aircraft. I'm sorry, he was a brave man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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