Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

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A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

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Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

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What was Tyler's last name? Grzesik.

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Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting a handjob from Edward scissor hands

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she's a woman

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Me: Ask me if i'm a truck. You: Are you a truck? Me: No.

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Feminism.

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Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

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womens rights

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A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

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Why did the chicken cross the street? K

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Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

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The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

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how does hitler drink soup ? with a spoon

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

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Why did Lisa fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock! Who's there? *Definitely not Lisa.

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What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

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Why would you kill a black man? Well, murderers have different motives, the most common of these are revenge or a psychological illness.

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what does I.C.T mean when a teacher says it it means I cant teach

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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What do you call a person who is deaf. It doesn't matter, they wont be able to hear it when you call them.

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Swag.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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