Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Love Chocolate, More Than I Love You

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at rhyming...... TITS

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The band.

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What do you call a really bad band? Nickelback.

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identical jokes get different votes.

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Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't get back up? She had no legs.

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Why did the blind man itch his knee? He has cancer

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Two stoners walk into a bar. They didn't drive there because they were high and wanted to enjoy a cool, evening stroll.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Seven was black

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friends are like snowflakes. if you piss on them they go away

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Why was the girl running out of the school? Because her principal was trying to rape her.

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I'd tell you a joke about Uganda but it wouldn't be worth it as it probably would keep a low score and possibly even get deleted for staying a week with a negative rating, for a number of reasons including that it isn't particularly funny, it was copied from another website and it is slightly racist. Taking into account what most people look for in a joke, it doesn't necessarily meet their needs and would more than likely fall into a lame category. And for that reason I have not submitted it.

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A man walks into himself. He is revealed.

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"What dosen't kill you makes you stronger" Except losing your arms.

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How do you survive the end of the world? You can't- everyone will die!

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Whats brown and sticky? A Stick.

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What do you say to a blind man in a sunglasses store? Nothing. Why do you feel the need to bother strangers while you needlessly shop at your local merchandise outlet?

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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A man walks in to a bar, He sits down and enjoys a pint.

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moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

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Why did the monkey fall off? It had no more lives. Why did the second monkey fall off? I dunno. Why did the third monkey fall off? Since the second was unknown, the third does not exist. Why did the little girl died? It's pretty obvious.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Go die in a hole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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