- Anti Joke

Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

When Kurt Cobain was little, his mother told him to never play with guns but I guess it went through one ear and out the other.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it was hit by a car

How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

sucks Syntax...

try this on someone: Knock Knock Who's there? Knock Knock Who's There? Knock Knock They will keep asking who's there while you laugh

God saw himself. Finally, proof.

I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee and had armor so it deflected off. Then I found out my wife was pregnant.

Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

After eating dinner, my dad said... "That was really good."

Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Why did you just verbalize the onomatopoeic sound of knocking on my door rather than taking the action itself?

What's small, white, and it killed Bruce Lee? Aspirin.

A: I slept in your mums bed last night. B: don't care dad

What is black and white and red all over? A nun that just fell down the stairs.

Your mumma is so fat, she has diabetes.

My mom told me and my brother to clean up o te commercial...but we were watching Netflix

What do you get if you pour water over a firework? A wet firework

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL

How do you stop a baby from making bad grades? You throw a javelin at its head.

What did the underprivileged girl get for Christmas? Nothing because Santa Claus is a media generated holiday icon and the real St. Nicolas has been deceased for almost 700 years.

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

Whats worse than a bee sting? -Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? -The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? -Three bee stings.

696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969669696969696969696969696969696969696969696696969696969696969696969696969696969696966969696969696969696969696969696969

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops