Two guys walk into a bar, have a good time, and exit the bar, relatively sober. They are driven home by a friend who agreed to be the designated drive for safety purposes and enjoy the rest of the evening with their wives, to whom they are happily married. Then the joke ends abruptly.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a car? I don't have a car in my garage.

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what did the gay man say to the pole? May i have this dance

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A man finds a lamp in the desert. He picks it up and dusts it off. The lamp becomes cleaner.

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knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

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Yo mamma is so fat that she is likely to consume large amounts of food regularly.

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So there's a monkey in a bar. I forgot the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

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knock knock Whos there? (the boy who knocked proceeds to run away with laughter)

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So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

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The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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I C U P White stuff

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haha

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What's blue and smells like sky? Sky

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How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

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a man walks into a bar several people leave as they can see the potential danger in the situation. - the man (also so known as a hippo) was Matt Ross

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Why did you laugh at this joke. Because it was funny.

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Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

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What's green, has six legs and would kill you if it fell on you out of a tree? A pool table.

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If there are 50 bricks on an airplane, and 3 fall off, how many are left? It does not matter how many are left, however, the 3 falling bricks pose a serious safety threat and more should have occurred to properly secure the bricks from falling from the aircraft.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue Wait Arent Violets purple?

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What does these 3 words all have in common? terrifiant, hrollvekjandi, Przera?aj?ce They all mean the same thing describing Ian! CREEPY

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Eating the apple.

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What do you call a white person? Caucasian

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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