How do you make a Hispanic man sad? Answer: steal everything he has until he has nothing

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A guy walks into a bar, unfortunately for him, he walked in on a huge bar fight and managed to get the hell knocked out of him as he entered the door.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday, Popeyes has a special sale buy one get one free fried chicken. The chicken was like "Oh hell no, today's Tuesday? I'm funna get my feathery-asss out of here.." However, chickens do not know what day it is, nor do they care about being captured by humans. I also made up the part when the chicken began talking.

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Why didn't the little boy wake up today? Because he's dead

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What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

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Whats black, white, and Asian all at the same time? A panda

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What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

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What did the two Japanese men say to each other? I have no idea I don't speak Japanese

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What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him to the vet and have him put to sleep, it's the only humane thing to do.

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Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

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That joke was so funny that I fell off my dinosaur. Then afterwards had to be put in a rehabilitation center because I am schizophrenic and dinosaurs are extinct.

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What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

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how do u drown a blond you put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

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What's the difference between a nutcracker and a can of tomato soup? Oh... I don't know, I was asking you.

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what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

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Joke

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

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How do you make a baby stop crying? Drown it in vinegar.

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What did little Timmy do in the Library? Read

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Why did the woman cross the road? Trick question, she didn't because she was in the kitchen.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue,All you HATERS of J. Bieber, Go suck your MOTHER.

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what did mickee utley say to micheal bane cnb

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what did the boy say to the over weight girl your fat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops