What did one dead baby say to the other dead baby? Nothing, they are both dead.

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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Two friends sit down at a table for lunch. One, in a very frustrated mood, says to the other, "You know what I don't get?" His friend immediately responds: "Sex."

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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9/11 my birthday

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... Your mom's a wh0re.

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Brother Bro-ther Broad her Soap

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"My, what big teeth you have!" exclaimed Little Red Riding Hood. "Because I'm a wolf," explained the wolf. "And I dress in women's clothing because it makes me happier."

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Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

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I once heard a funny joke, it was as funny as a funeral

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why would a man mistake a watermelon for AK-47? i dont know. The man probably has mental issues.

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whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

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what did the chocolate bar say to the ice cream cone? nothing: chocolate bars can't talk

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What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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What's red,little and its in the corner??? --- Strawberry in the corner

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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Why did the cow cross the road? -Because it lives in India and is allowed to.

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Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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How do you know if an elephant has been in your fridge? If it is laying in pieces around the crumbled wreckage of your house. [L]

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What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

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What is black and white and red all over? A road killed zebra.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops