so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the other side Why did the lollipop cross the road ? It was stuck to the chicken's head Why did the chicken commit suicide ? He couldn't get the lollipop off its head

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

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Why does Derrek Ashmore act so feminine on his facebook statuses? Because he has a vagina so it is appropriate for him

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How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? He didn't, animal control took the dog away from Helen because she could not properly care for the dog.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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Why does everyone treat Jesus as some sort of saint for making five thousand people bread, when Hitler made six million people toast?

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Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

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Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

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My mind is like full of holes so I cannot remember where I am anymore, and I am tired in addition, but say, what the hell is a tussle? Sounds cute, but what is that?

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A: Is this the Krusty Krab? B: No, this is Pizza Hut. Please stop prank calling us.

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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What's funny about Antijokes.com? Everything

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What did Pablo experience during his first day in private school? the atmosphere of a private school

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Why did the little girl with no arms an legs cry? Because she fell off the swing.

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A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

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- Women have rights, aren't they? - Yes, they have.

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots? It depends on what his name is.

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Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

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NEVER

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what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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