Why did sara fall out of the tree? -she had no arms.. Knock knock. -who's there? not sara.

Q: What did the vomiting man say to his friend? A: BLEEEAAARRRGGHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to his wife? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the waiter in the restaurant? A: BLAAAAAARGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Leonardo DiCaprio? A: BLEEEEAAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the convenience store clerk? A: BLAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to your mom? A: BLAAAARRRGGGHH!!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Barack Obama? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!! Q; What did the vomiting man say to the King of Saudi Arabia? A: BLAAAAAAAAAAAEEEAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the bartender? A: BLLLEEEEAAAARRGHHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the funeral home director? A: BLLLEEEAAAARRRGGGHHH!!

What's the difference between a 7 year old boy and a 50 year old man? Hair.

Why did Sally fall out of the tree? Because She had no arms or legs... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Knock-Knock? Who's There? Not Sally

a cancer patient walks into a bar and has a stroke

What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

I wonder what happen to John? Oh John I know what happen to him. What happened to him then? He was playing on the bridge and fell off on accident. Is he okay? Damn women of coarse he is not okay!!!

Why did Princess Diana cross the road? Because she wasnt wearing a seat belt.

Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I f**ked your mom last night. Will you marry me?

What did the white male say to the black male who had just robbed a bank? I'm glad you have a reliable source of income to feed yourself and your family

A pengiuin walked into a bar. Just kidding, it waddled at an increasingly fast rate.

Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

What did batman say to robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

A black man is in line for a club. The bouncer says: This is a white party only. The black man says: Damn, I wasnt aware I had to wear white clothing. He then left the line and told himself to check the promotional page on facebook more often.

A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

her: what did your last slave die of? him: syphillis

Roses are red, Violets are blue, these two statement are obvious unless you are color blind

What is black and white and sleeps a lot? A tired zebra.

So Nero, seriously, don't be mean, call me, I am going to bed now, nighty nite.

If omar has 7 apples and his bus is 7 minutes early, what is the mass of the sun? Pi. Partially because the piece of paper couldnt dance with your mother.

What did the rich man say to the poor man? i feel sorry for you

What's hiding in Redfoo (from LMFAO)'s afro? Nobody knows...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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