Q: Why did the man have aids? A: He had unprotected sex with a man who had aids.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: Men are always very careful to have penises. Why don't women care enough to have them? A: That's a very good question.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

roses are red violets are blue. they both smell like flowers

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between Josef fritsal and a fridge? A fridge can be thrown at a bowl of custard.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock Knock Who's there? The holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A frog walks into a bar and the bartender thinks he is very well evolved because frogs don't walk they hop

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a bench full of white people The NBA

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Well it all started when 7 did something horrible to 8 and 9. Always being used for various things and never getting credit, 7 finally snapped one day at the office. He went home for lunch, which was uncharacteristic for him. He came back with a large duffle bag and a trench coat on. He walked into the the middle of the office and opened the bag and trench coat. The events that followed are now known as the office slaughtering of 1992. 7 ended up gutting 8 alive and eating its intestines. 9 was forced to watch then inch by inch was cut up. His heart was ripped out and shown to him before he died. The body was then thrown into acid, and 7 hung himself with piano wire, but lived. 7 also has herpes and 6 doesnt want anything to do with that shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Where did the drunk Mother drive? Back to the Bar because she forgot her Baby.. Except she left it left it on the roof of the car...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

If life throws you melons, you should do your best to avoid them. Large and hard objects such as melons can easily harm you if moving at high speeds. Fortunately, life is not a physical entity that can throw melons or anything else - so the chances of this event occurring to you are exceedingly low.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says we dont sell juice here. The jew promptly leaves, offended.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A very nervous looking black man walks into a bar full of white people, however, the white people are accepting of all races, so they invite him to sit next to them.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What happened to Sally, did she get that cough checked out? A: She died while driving there and got in a 12 car pileup.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why didn't the Mexican have a job? Because stereotypes made employers unjustly reluctant to hire a hard-working, competent man.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? RAPED.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is long, hard and comes out of a gay persons bum? poo

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people and regularly attend a synagogue and pizza is and italian food that many people find to be enjoyable to eat

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What were the murderer's last words before he was put to death by electric chair? "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NNNNNFHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.................................................................................................................." He then defecated in his pants.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

You know what's a real drag? A club foot

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man wearing a 'What Would Jesus Do' bracelet and a livestrong bracelet goes up to a blind kid and rubs his eyes and the kid can see. The kid was was not used to the bright lights and wandered into traffic, was hit by a car and killed instantly.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops