How did the baby cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

Why did Humpty Dumpty fall off the wall? The wall was unstable and not to be sat on.

In Soviet Russia it's pretty cold.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

There's a black guy in a mansion. What's he doing there? He owns it.

Sarah lost both arms in a car accident Knock knock Who's there? Not sarah. Roses are red Violets are blue Wow. Clever Knock knock Who's there? Still not Sarah, as she is in a serious condition at her local hospital, and so is fighting for her life.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

If a quiz is quizzical, what's a testicle?

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Unfortunate

What do you call somebody with no arms or legs and they are stranded in the middle of the ocean? Answer: screwed

What's the best way to anger a Muslim? Key his car in front of him.

Knock, knock. Who is there? Child services, here to take your children. The following day, there is another knock at the door. Who is there? The police. The woman runs into the kitchen and kills herself.

What did one hand say to the other? Nothing, you fool, hands don't talk.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Since when is it any of your business? Cant we live in a world where chickens can cross the road freely without having there motives questioned?

What did the duck say when it saw a puddle? Nothing.Ducks are uncapable of speaking human speech.

If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

John Cena

What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

What did the tiger say to the monkey? Nothing really, just a lot of growls and other sounds as he consumed it.

How Many Chickens does it take to make an egg? NOrmally 2

what is black and white and red all over? a group of people of mixed races playing paintball.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...