a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

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I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

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Why did the boys shout ZACHATTACK? Because zach was attacking

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Ever hear the joke about the blind guy taking care of the baby ? ... Good, because it's not funny to make fun of blind people and I doubt a blind guy would ever be legally taking care of a baby.

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baby on board sign?? target aquired.............

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Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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A bar walks into a man

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Why did Lebron go to Miami? Because Chuck Norris told him to.

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What's the difference between men and women? I really can't tell anymore, there's so many goddamn transvestites.

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-Doctor! Scientists in California have enough proofs to demonstrate that the Christian religion is false. -Oh my God!

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Mom says my name I reply Coming.

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hi

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How do you get pikachu onto a bus? You can't. Pikachu is a fictional creature and therefore does not exist.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

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Jesse likes to jack off and lick the white stuff off of his balls and digest it

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How do you stop an oncoming bus? You push a stroller in front of it.

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? An astronaut. He's all alone in the vacuum of space. No one hears him knocking.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Why did the tomato blush? A tomato's complexion is already red so it simply appears to be blushing

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How many gun shots does it take to kill you? 1..2... 3...4... Samantha reapeatedly kept shooting her enemy until she noticed that her enemy was Chuck Norris. So how many gunshots does it take to kill Chuck Norris? The world may never know.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops