What did Harry Potters owl say to Harry Potter? delivowe for hawwy potter!

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What's the difference between a leopard and a jaguar ? The rabbit flies faster, while the pigeon can breathe underwater.

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Whats Funnier than a clown? Woman's Basketball.

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A woman comes at the doctor.

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What do you call a guy with aids? Your dad

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A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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A gay man named pat played on a gay website with a child named Charlie

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Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are stupid. It most likely starved to death when it got stuck in a hole.

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Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his kids.

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What did the mexican do after he finished his taco? He was eaten by a dinosaur.

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roses are red violets are blue i'll be back in an hour or two

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if your having trouble coming through the back door, try a Butterfinger

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Why did the robber wear a mask? Because he had eczema.

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A blind man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at the man for a moment, then asks : - Excuse me, sir. Are you blind ? And the blind man says : - Yes.

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:( You are right Nero, I am terribly sorry, when I see you, I see the brightest man I have ever seen, should you ever turn against me and stop underestimating yourself, there is nothing I could do.

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I have two coins in my hand that add up to 30 cents, and one of them is not a nickel. I accidentally dropped them.

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Why didnt Timmy Go to school? He Died.

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So theres this Jew, right? He got shot to death.

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Why did the horse stop runnIng? His master beat him to death.

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A man and his wife are disagreeing about what type of car to get. The wife continously nags him about getting her something that will go from 0-200 in 4 seconds, so he gets her a scale and buys himself a truck, 1 min later an abulance is called because the wife hit the husband with his new car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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