Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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What's up? Up Adverb: Toward the sky or a higher position. Preposition: From a lower to a higher point on (something); upward along: "I climbed up a flight of steps". Adjective: Directed or moving toward a higher place or position: "the up escalator". Noun: A period of good fortune. Verb: Do something abruptly or boldly: "she upped and left him". Synonyms: adverb. upward - upwards - aloft - above - upstairs - overhead preposition. on - upon - over - along - with adjective. rising noun. ascent - rise - upgrade verb. raise - enhance - increase - lift - rise

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Roses are red, violets are blue No they're not, violets are violet

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can A hundred dead babies in a trash can Whats worse than a hundred dead babies in a trash can A live one at the bottom Whats worse than that It eats it way out Whats worse than that It brings friends

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What's big, old, and brown? A tree.

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A blonde went to buy a Pizza and after ordering, the assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve. "Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"

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Women's rights

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Slow and steady wins the race, But only in some cases. Mostly never.

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A Jewish man walks by a penny.

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What's faster than a Nascar Racecar? My thoughts. -Juanita

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Why did the girl fall off the swing ? Because she lost her balance and the force of gravity put upon her was too great for her to bear, resulting in her fall.

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If life hands you lemons, take them they taste good

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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How do you make a priest cry? ... You kill his family

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Friend: Do you want to go to the bar or see a movie first? Me: Yes.

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why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

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What do you call a fish with 6 legs? A fish with 6 legs.

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A black man and a white woman walk into a bar and celebrate their interracial marriage anniversary over a couple of drinks and then call a cab to avoid driving while intoxicated

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Whats funny and has 2 wheels The holocaust, I lied about the wheels, and the funny

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A man walks into a bar. -Can I ask where am I? - he sais -Yes, you can. - sais the barman Awkward silence occurs. -Why aren't you asking? I said you can.

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why did the boring girl get ditched she was boring...

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What did the black basketball player say to the white basketball player when he lost? Good game.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cot Death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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