Hey! That's mine! Give it back!

What did the whale say when he ran into a wall? - Oh Shit

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

What's the difference between a pessimist and a magnet? One is made of flesh and can talk, think and do things. The other is made of metal and can only pull things towards itself or push them away. But strangely, the latter is a lot more welcome in most situations.

What would Muhammed do?

Why don't vampires like garlic? Every vampires was raped by a garlic salesman.

what happened to the boy who got hit by a truck he went to the hospitel

How do you stop 5 black guys from raping one white girl? You call the police.

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

roses are dead violets are gross guess what i'm in your closet

Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

A black man walks into a bar. "Whoops, that's not the Weed shop!"

2

Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

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Kittens are orange, puppies are grey, and they both make good pets

What does? 42

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead. Dead people can't drive.

Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

Who's dumb and retarted. A person that is dumb and retarted.

What does a black car thief do with a stolen car? Drive it

What's worse than a man with AIDS? The fact that this is considered a joke.

What does Malcolm X think about when hes horny? Sex!

You know what's gay?? Lesbians

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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