What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

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Why did the girl miss her date? She got killed.

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I've just been struck by an enormous bolt of lightning. I am covered in boils and my house is full of frogs. I strongly recommend that when referring to God, always use the upper case 'H' on all personal pronouns.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a brand new Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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roses are red violets are red the whole world is red i started the holocaust

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How do you make a plumber sad? You murder his family.

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I dig, you dig, we dig, they dig, he digs, she digs, everybody digs. Guys, it's not a very profound poem, but it's deep.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You know you really should have a safer way of finding out who is really on the other side. Now a days it's just not safe to ask, "who's there". I mean it could have been, Milkman, Plummer, or worst a Land Shark!

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How do Mexicans like their eggs? It's a matter of personal opinion, of course.

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what hurts more than getting shot in the arm Getting shot in both arms!

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What do gay kittens eat? Cat food. Friskies and Fancy Feast are both popular brands.

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womens rights

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's There? Person B came down with a serious case of amnesia that day and can't remember who anyone is.

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Why did the boy wear glasses? Because he had bad eyesight.

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Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

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knock knock who's there? Police oh shit

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A Pilot.

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a kid was born with down syndrome on christmas night

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What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

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A Jew and a Muslim are playing golf. Just not together.

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Do you know what God said to Hitler as he approached the gate of heaven? ??????????????????

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What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

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Why didn't Hitler go to heaven? He killed millions of jews and was an atheist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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