whats 1 + 1? 2

what did the cow say to shabab?....... want some milk

The 80's called. They need their couch back.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken so he could fry it.

Your dad is so hairy, that he shaves to look more cleanly.

i am iron man running over fat kids in my van

A priest and a police officer are sitting at a bar. They both have considerable drinking problems because problems unrelated to their respective occupations. The bartender's name is Mike.

Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

Whats better than seeing a worm in your apple... Reading the the next anti-joke.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

Two peanuts were walking down the road. One was assaulted because they were walking in Detroit.

A man was walking down the street He was then killed in a drive by.

What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's green and shitty? A bootleg stick.

Why's Jeds head so big? Curley wurly.

Q: What's gray and comes in gallons? A: Gray paint.

Why did the boy drown? Because he was actually a brick. I lied about him being a boy.

Why did Billy fall off the slide? Someone threw a refridgerator at his face.

what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

what’s worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? one dead baby in 12 trash cans

What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs at night? An experimental animal mutilated then exposed to radiation.

A Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?". The horse didn't understand English, so he took a shit on the floor, and left.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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