What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

If I had a penny for every time I said the word "the" I would have AIDS

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

What did the hat say to the scarf? Nothing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

Why was lady crying? Because her ten yer old son died of cancer..

Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

I have never liked jokes. They promote laughter, which is the music of Satan strangling hairy children and wildebeast. I'd like to thank anti-joke.com for their work in the struggle against hilarity.

What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

A. What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew: B. Pizza's don't scream when you put them into a oven.

knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted off in space.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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