A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

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What did tyler say to Jake? My pussy is wet jew

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A captain crashes his boat into a rock. He has the option to save to save his wife or his best friend. He saves neither and drowns.

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One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

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What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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What's green, brown, red, and is covered with crumbs in a ditch on the side of the road? A girl-scout who got hit by a car...

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Q:When a T- Rex walks into your house what does it mean? A: Your on pot, T-rex's are extinct

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Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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Charles Manson is innocent.

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I heard that the Boston marathon was a BLAST!

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Hey man how was the trip to Hiroshima? Great it blew my mind!! And how was Nagasaki ? It was the bomb!!

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Have you read Shakespeare? Dunno. Who wrote it? Shakespeare.

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What is the most dangerous place to be right now? Rodney Kings pool.

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Whats the same about a jew and firewood? They both burn.

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why wont chin ever take his hat off because his head will be cold

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How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb...1 How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb...2

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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How to you stop the world from ending? You dont the world has been destroyed 5 times over again before and it will most likely happen to us one day.

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What did the cow say to the chicken? - Muuuuhhhhhhhhh!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops