boobs!

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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how many licks did it take the boy to get to the center of a tootsie pop? he died of cancer

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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i see trees are green, Roses are red, Violets are blue and i think to myself What a Wonderful World

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Why did the cat cross the road? To see its mom who was lying dead on the other side

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How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, but I'm late for work.

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whats worse than the smell of nail polish? burning jews.

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just in time?

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A co-pilot

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Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? Because they kept saying Bach bach Bach. No. Beethoven was deaf. He couldnt understand what they were saying.

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What's the difference between your jokes and your penis? No one laughs at your jokes.

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What's worse than being arrested? Being arrested twice

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a man walks into a bar... his drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

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Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

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What hurts like hell? HELL

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What did the homeless guy get for Christmas ? Frostbite

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Did you hear about the plane that crashed and killed 1000 people? My sister has cancer.

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Yes, it's for the patiënt in the other room.

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Whats white and can talk? Snow, i lied about the colour

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penis haha

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what did the n i g g e r with alzheimers say to the c h i n k? 9/11 was the funniest fake joke since the holocaust and 9/11 and the holocaust and 9/11... and... what?

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Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops