Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

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A dyslexic man walks into a building labeled, Bra. He then thinks he has found heaven but is suprised when all that is served is beer, not milk.

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If you have read this its to late. You have already read this. Im am very sorry.

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A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: a half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee and a 1 lb. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, “You must be single.” The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict’s intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said “Well, you know what, you’re absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?” The drunk replied, “Cause you’re ugly.”

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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Why did the gay guy come out of the closet? He finally found the shirt he was looking for

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Reeves Christopher

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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North Korea is red. Amerika is blue. But they both split blood. All over you

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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A white player in the NBA. Wait...

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Why was the black Jew sad? He had to sit at the back of the oven

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A man is unemployed, ugly, short, fat, smelly and stupid. That's what she said.

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Your dad isn't gay...but his boyfriend..HES REALLY GAY!

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Roses are Green Violets are Black Everything's different since I took crack

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

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A man walks into a bar he's drunk and can't feel it But he's ok

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Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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What's better than seeing a Detroit Lions game? Not being in Detroit.

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my grandpa has the heart of a lion, and a permanent ban to the zoo.

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What do a cow girl and an orange have in common? They all are fruit, except for the cowgirl.

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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Two black men walk into a Ku Klux Klan meeting. they are immediately lynched by the mob who hates them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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