Your mama's so fat, that when she opened the window, wind came in!!!

Why don't you ever want to greet your friend Jack on the plane? Because your wife cheated on you with him and she is having his baby, if you were to even think about talking to Jack, you'd end up slitting his throat and throwing him off the side of the plane into a crocodile pit where they will make a feast of his body for the next couple days... So just don't greet Jack

what do trees like to drink? r o o t b e a r

A cricket walks into a bar and the bartender says,"Hey, we have a drink named after you!' and the cricket says,"Oh really? You have a drink named Joe?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in a van headed to the slaughterhouse.

Q: What do a hockey coach and a bar stool have in common? A: because seven ATE nine

What stars with C, is hairy on the outside, moist on the inside and ends with T and has UN in the middle? Coconut

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken. How do you get a baby to run faster? Chase it with the lawn mower. What do you get when you cut a baby with a straight razor? An erection. What do you get when you put a dead baby in a blender? Hold on. I'll tell you in a second. What's pink and spits? A baby in a frying pan. -S

Why did the bear eat the asian? It was hungry

A blind man walks into a bar. It was a book shop.

Three jews walked into a bar I lied, it was a gas chamber

Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the KFC man was chasing him.

What did red say to yellow? Move over orange is coming now.

How do you judge a black person? By the content of their character.

haha look at that guys shirt! what's wrong with it? i don't know.. nothing i guess

How do you run faster than a cheetah? Cut off its legs.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cancer

How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

Your dads dead. lol

Roses are red Violets are blue Just smoked some Meth nelnfjknfkjnwkejnkjnwefkjnKJNFKJRNFKWNEFEJNFJNWKEJNWFKEJFN

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

Whats worse than the holocaust? Anal.

Roses are red Babies cry Get in my bed Or you will dies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...