i said call 911 and they said whats the number?

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What do you call a person with no eyes, ears, or mouth? Helen Keller

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A horse finds himself sleeping in the ocean. Immediately, he decides to be a dolphin.

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there are 2 men standing on the roof of a building, one of them jumps off, the other one is called Peter

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Q. At the main menu why are there two people sad? A. Because there is.

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Suddenly a wild bunny appears ::::::::::::(:oI)

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Q:Whats Brown and sticky? A:Maple Syrup

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If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

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What is black and white and red all over? A multi-racial orphan who has recently suffered a fatal stab wound to a major artery.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I forgot.

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Two flatfishes swam in a bathtub.

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84.52% of users disapprove of your post, plus or minus 3%.

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Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

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Son : daddy ,I got punished in school today. Dad :why? Son: My teacher pointed the scale towards me saying -"At the end of this scale there is an idiot"..... I just asked "WHICH END ?.

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Why did the priest go to jail? He had sexual relations with young boys.

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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What did Jim do after the police gave him a ticket? He followed them home and used their children's limbs to rape them.

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What did the loser say to the winner? Good game

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What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

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Q. Why did uncle Al die of smoking? A. His socks were to big -Noah Weisskopf

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How many orangoutangs does it take to screw in a light bulb? 16; mongoloid

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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So a little girl walked into a bar... A concerned adult then told the bartender. The bartender's name was Jim. Jim then asked the girl if she knew her phone number. The little girl said nothing and the bar tender was perplexed at the petrified look on the girls face. Jim the bartender then called the police and explained the situation.Once the girl was brought back to the police station it was learned that she had been missing for three months in a nearby county. The police then return to the bar to find that the owner had multiple kidnapped little girls in a cage under the bar that only he and the kidnapped girls knew about before the cops and Jim the bartender discovered it. The police then arrested The owner of the bar. He stood trial and was senteced to death row, he remains there today.

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Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, I very sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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