Andi: I have a great knock-knock joke, but you need to start it. Jake: Okay...Knock-knock! Andi: Who's there? Jake: ...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What starts with E and ends with lephant? Not giraffe

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, Violets are too. You're bleeding out, I stabbed you.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Johnny had 100 chocolate bars. He ate 95 and gave 3 to his friend. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the fat girl a virgin? Good morals

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you drown a blonde. Put a Scratch N Sniff at the bottom of a pool and tell her to sniff it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why couldn't the man play frisbee? he was a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

tim tebow and mark sanchez will lead the jets to the superbowl

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do a jew, an African, and u white man stop a train? They pull the breaks

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the difference between Asians and buckets? I don't use Asians to scoop water out of the lake.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: Why did the boy eat an apple? A: A strong man stuffed it down his throat.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I have CDO it's like OCD but in the right order

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's brown and sticky??? A brown stick

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Where did Susie go after the explosion? I don't know: she was nowhere near the explosion at the time that it happened. She probably got up to use the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the difference between a bike and a baby? There are a lot of differences

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf, any situation with her in the drivers seat of a car would have serious implications.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock, knock. Who's there? George. George who? Oh sorry, I thought this was number 52. my mistake.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Who went shopping on Saturday? There is a reason I put a question mark there, so you guys could reply. Not so I could respond myself.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why couldn't the little girl color in her coloring book? Her arms were amputated.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because it wasn't a pilot it was a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops