Bags of delicious poop.

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Why did John fall off his bike? Because, he is a fish and fish cannot ride bikes.

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Who took the cookie from the cookie jar? Your mom

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A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

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What's your favorite Sylvia Plath quote? "Turn on the oven."

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What should you do if you are being chased by a black man. keep running and if he tag's you, then you should try tag him back since this is a simple game of tag.

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What's worse than Christmas alone? Pedophiles.

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What did the man and woman do in bed together? Sleep.

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What do you call a deer in the wild? a deer

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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What did the Asian father say to his son when he got a b? Good job son!

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Don't make jokes about the Holocaust. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off a watchtower.

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Knock knock Who's there? A Jehovahs Witness

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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How did Jimmy get hit by the car? He dropped his Ice cream cone.

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there once was a cat it was brown? fus-roh-dah

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What did the dog get for Christmas? euthanization

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Jesse gets back at people who takes his job, by trying to get with their sloppy seconds.. Emphasize trying.

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Why was the little boys mom watching tv in the living room? Better question why is she out of the kitchen.

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Your momma's so fat, when Jesus said, "Let there be light!," she had to scoot over.

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How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.

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Why did sally fall off the swings? She didn't have any arms. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally, she doesn't have any arms.

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hi i'm a dick, i mean mitt romney

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Why did women scream loudly!? As the women was unexpectadly frightend!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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