Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

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Why do black people make the best milkshakes? because they use the finest ingredients

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Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone? Nothing

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What did Hitler say to Obama Nothing because Hitler is dead.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. They have been planning a girls night out for weeks.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Crazy Rhinoceros

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What do you call some one in the middle of the ocean without a boat skrewed.

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why was the man scared of the tree because it was shady

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what is racecar backwards in reverse

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What's worse than the holocaust? nothing it was a terrible act in history

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What did the bank teller say after the man asked for a pen? Would you prefer black or blue?

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How many lollipops does it take to shingle a dog? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Cars were invented after her death, so she never had the opportunity to learn.

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Q: Why can't sally play on the swing? A: Because she has no arms Q: Who was the first to climb mount everest? A: Not Sally

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what did the guy say when his partner took a poop on his chest? It was unnecessary for you to deficate onto my chest. In no way at all was that sexually stimulating, and i shall consider seeking out a new partner.

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What do you get when a person and a cat try to have a child of some sort? Nothing because there chromosomes don't match, and there for physically impossible.

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Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

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Alice, seriously do as I say, I lived with the man for over 16 years, those are not hallucinations, its PTSD, without ritalin he will just go trough that agony for nothing, not coffee not chocolate or any of that, anything that helps his focus. Seriously do not be a bitch Alice, listen to him and do as he says. Its not the first time people think he is having hallucinations when his eyes start moving back and forth like crazy, he is not seeing things, he is experiencing this as if they where real, and just because he can stay in that state for days, does not mean he is meant to go trough that kind of agony because of your ethics or caring or whatever your hesitation might be, the man can go without food for weeks if he has to, but not after you sneak trash like Zopiclone into his system. That was a mistake of yours, make up for it Alice, or ill make you pay.

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Why did the maths book commit suicide? It wanted to be history

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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So like i was like 3 and I was like stupid or something I was only three, come on! three

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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